<![CDATA[Living Whole Coaching<br />Maggie French, ACC - Living Whole Blog]]>Sun, 20 May 2012 01:56:51 -0500Weebly<![CDATA[Manifesting Reality . . . ]]>Tue, 15 May 2012 16:33:02 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2012/05/manifesting-reality.htmlLast weekend I watched . . . again . . . the movie "What The Bleep Do We Know." I was, again, particularly drawn by the quotes from Dr. Joe Dispenza, such as this one. 

“We have to formulate what we want, be so concentrated on it, so focused on it, and so aware of it that we lose track of ourselves, we lose track of time, we lose track of our identity.

The moment we become so involved in the experience that we lose track of ourselves, we lose track of time, is the only picture that's real. Everybody's had the experience of making up their mind that they've wanted something.

That's Quantum Physics in action. That's manifesting reality”

This video has other quotes of Dr. Dispenza.  Makes one think . . . . 

]]><![CDATA[The Value of Shame and Guilt]]>Mon, 14 May 2012 09:44:48 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2012/05/the-value-of-shame-and-guilt.html“Shame is embarrassment because of failure of performance; guilt is offending something that you regard as a higher authority.” Joseph Campbell

Of late, the works of Joseph Campbell resonate.  It is wonderful that we have video of his many lectures and conversations to listen to his interpretation on the Hero’s Journey, man’s quest for and to Self.  In his lecture on mythology, “Joseph Campbell: Mythos,” (http://movies.netflix.com/WiMovie/Joseph_Campbell_Mythos/70213209?trkid=2361637 ) he succinctly differentiates Shame and Guilt.  For all the negativity we experience for these two emotions, his differentiation offers insight that these emotions are neither good nor bad, that it is perceptive that makes these strong emotions “good” or “bad.” 

In our work do we differentiate Shame from Guilt?  Performance and Purpose?  How could an understanding of the value of Shame and Guilt bring excellence to our work?  Yes, value.  How could feeling  Shame as being honest with oneself on how one is brining oneself to one’s work; and, Guilt, how one is living to one’s higher value bring excellence?  As we work, do we perform to our own highest ability?  Are we honest with our Self as to what that is?  Do we contemplate the higher purpose of our work; and our sense of Guilt when we are not to that purpose?  Ah, Joseph Campbell, how he continues to make one think. . . .

]]><![CDATA[Stop “Trying” and Watch Yourself Grow]]>Mon, 26 Mar 2012 16:39:11 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2012/03/stop-trying-and-watch-yourself-grow.htmlIt has been awhile since my last post.  February and March have been very busy months.  Yeah!  That said, this topic has been germinating in that time and finally decided to join this reality.  

How many times have you sat and listened to your client say,”I try . . .”  How do you feel about what they are saying?  It resonates with me as a dull thud, stopping them from action.  I feel their energy blocked and the “try” keeping them from doing.

Early on in my coaching I found my client’s energy would shift when I asked them to reframe what they said without the word “try.”  Still today, it does not cease to amaze me how much lighter and more energized they feel with the reframe.  Neurolinguistics is such a fascinating aspect of coaching; the use of words and their ability to motive and unmotivate, “try” being the latter.

As a coach who endeavors to walk her talk, I challenged myself to remove the word “try” from my vocabulary.  It was quite a challenge early on.  When we “try” we are placating ourselves with a false sense that we are doing.  I, too, could feel how I did the same myself.  Today the word creeps into a sentence now and then. When it does I pause, smile, reframe and feel I am doing.  As Yoda would say “Do or not do, there is no try.”  

Next Round of “The Coaching Circle”  beginning in April for another way to hone your coaching skills.
]]><![CDATA[Ah-ha I Get It!]]>Thu, 05 Jan 2012 11:26:42 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2012/01/ah-ha-i-get-it.html_ I begin with Happy New Year!  A year has moved to our memories and another awaits, full of possibilities.

The week between the holidays offered time to read, watch and listen.  I read some fiction, some non-fiction, some business building.  I watched . . . movies, my favorite pastime.  And I had the opportunity to listen to an NPR program “On Being” hosted by Krista Tippet.  A program most interesting and one I get the opportunity to listen to only occasionally.  The program is most thought provoking.  However, I write of the program for it provided me with an “ah-ha” moment. 

What are “ah-ha” moments?  These are times in our life when we finally understand something.  Suddenly our thoughts are in full alignment, the answer is there.  You Know the Truth.  The questioning ceases, and you know how to move forward.

Assisting a client in finding the answers that show them how to move forward is an aspect of the essence of coaching.  During a conversation, when a client has an “ah-ha” moment, a moment when not only do they feel in alignment, you do as well.  It is such shared energy.  You both know that a moving forward is going to occur.  As a coach to personally experience such a moment, to feel it, know it, integrate it into who you are, does so much to deepen your authenticity.  With personal experience to such a moment energy expands in the sharing when it comes to clients. 

So my ah-ha moment . . .

As a first born Catholic the teaching of Catholicism are deep in my fabric.  However, there is an aspect of the teaching of Christ that I have long had difficulty with.  This being the concept of “Turn the other cheek.”  Throughout my life there have been times when turning the other cheek felt as if I was being taken advantage of.  I wondered how does that resolve conflict between people? 

After 58 years of living, in the broadcast “Pursing Happiness,” I reached an understanding of what Jesus Christ meant, and so much has fallen into place since.

First the full translation as stated in the American King James Version, Luke 6:29 –“And to him that smites you on the one cheek offer also the other; and him that takes away your cloak forbid not to take your coat also."

Toward the end of the discussion between the Dalai Lama, and three global spiritual leaders: a Muslim scholar, a chief rabbi, and a presiding bishop, Ms. Tippet asked, “Your Holiness, compassion is obviously central to what you teach and also to your understanding of a happy life . . . what advice you might offer to this moment in our collective life?  The Dalai Lama responded, “Jesus Christ, . . .For example, in the Gospel, you know, in the Gospel you find the commandment that, if some hit you on your right cheek, then turn the other cheek.”  The discussion continued on compassion, nonviolence, etc. 

Then Most Rev. Dr. Katharine Jefferts Schori, the Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church of the U.S provided my “ah-ha’ moment.  She explained that, “Hitting on one cheek in the ancient world, the superior would hit with the back of the hand. And if you turned your head, he would have to use the other hand and look you in the face. So suddenly the dynamic has changed. He would have to see you. He can't simply hit an inferior.

That’s it! Ah-ha!  I told myself.  When someone has to look you in the eye it becomes personal and that is the opportunity.  A relationship, a resolution, a solution can only be formed when it becomes personal.  It was such an OMJ (Oh, my Jesus) moment.  In turning “the other cheek,” there is the opportunity for the situation to become personal.

It exemplified another aspect of the essence of coaching.  The coaching relationship is personal.  That meeting the client, eye-to-eye, as a equal allows for the most gratifying coaching relationship.  Not as a superior .  Not as an inferior.  As an equal partner is when all things are possible.  That when a client “hits” you with a statement that doesn’t feel quite right look into their eyes, “turn the other cheek.”  I hope that explains it somewhat, for this is another aspect of the “ah-ha” moment, words are unnecessary and any words shared are insufficient in explaining the feeling, the understanding that has been made Known.

So in closing this first writing of the New Year, as a coach building experience, skills, knowledge, personally experiencing ah-ha’s, any growth, and integrating it into your own fabric is building your authenticity, your unique coaching gifts, and bringing the best of you to your clients.

Happy New Year!

]]><![CDATA[Progress]]>Tue, 20 Dec 2011 12:25:13 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2011/12/progress.htmlThe holiday season is going full tilt.  Shopping.  Parties.  Baking.  Family.  Friends.  Thelist seems endless as the days tick away to the first of the year.  We wonder as we rush around are we making any progress . . . on anything!?  We get so enmeshed in what we are doing we seem to leave out even a moment or two to reflect on that special gift we were able to find for our 90 year old aunt and new beau in our life.  Passing the time with a friend we have not seen all year at the Christmas Party over the weekend.  OR the cookies that came out soooo fantastic this year. 

Yesterday, Sunday afternoon, I was decorating the tree by myself as the Patriots were playing, enough said.  I had just finished putting all the lights on and no more than had the first Christmas ornament on than my father knocked at the door.  He had just brought my mother back to the nursing home after Sunday dinner and wanted to stop by, say hi.  Well the Hi turned into the two of us trimming the tree and with the voices upstairs my husband abandoning the football game to join us in holiday cheer and the smell of evergreen.

Well what does this all have to do with progress.  Progress is known when one takes time to reflect on what one has done.  As you go about building that coaching business of yours.  Coaching four, five clients a week.  Preparing for that workshop coming up in six weeks.  Take this time of year to stop and reflect on how far your coaching has come.  Who you you have seen grow?  What new skills you found yourself using as the year progressed. 

Yes it has been a challenging year . . . for everyone.   For all the naysayers, there has been progress.  You and your coaching has moved forward, grown.  Take a few moments for yourself and write down your response to the following questions.
  • What changes have you experienced in the past  year?  (ie.. change of job, a new role, change in residence etc.) 
  • What was the highlight of your year? 
  • What opportunities do you see before you?
Remember to feel your progress a look back to where you have been is the means to knowing whatever the year has brought you, there is progress. 

I wish you a Happy Holidays and A Wonderful Opportunity Filled New Year


]]><![CDATA[Theme . . . Content]]>Thu, 01 Dec 2011 12:00:32 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2011/12/theme-content.htmlIt sits at the front of my mind as I write this next, what would you call this?  Thought share?  Helpful hints share?  Coaching tools share?  Business skills share?  Before I digress too much, it sits at the front of my mind, what is the theme of this blog?  What would be appropriate content? Heck, what does appropriate mean? 

I am of the belief whatever one attempts, anything, it has the best outcomes when done with a sense of purpose.  So what is the purpose of this blog . . .

The purpose of The Coaching Circle is to provide coaches, at all levels, and most specifically new coaches, an environment for refining coaching expertise. 

Is that the purpose of this blog?  To provide you with a place to share your thoughts toward refining your coaching expertise?  Yes that feels . . . balanced.

Coaching expertise . . . What would you say to coaching expertise being that balance between advising and listening?  There are times when in conversation with a client, I will say "What about this? What about that?" A coach is a partner and supporter of the client being all they can be.  Yet, there are times the client is looking for guidance.  Did that make sense?  While I know sharing the view of a situation from a different vantage point  may awaken perspectives that may not have been thought of, what is being shared is my perception and my judgment.   What makes me confident, comfortable it is for the client's best verse my "stuff?"  That's the balance to continually refine, advice that supports and grows with listening that builds self awareness.

So how did this begin?  Purpose for this blog in efforts to grow a theme and content.  Yes it feels balanced that the purpose of this blog, as of The Coaching Circle, is to provide assistance in refining one's coaching expertise.  So I will stop here, and let theme and content come when they are ready. 
]]><![CDATA[Where To Start?]]>Sun, 20 Nov 2011 19:51:43 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2011/11/where-to-start.html_ I started to write about this earlier last week.  I was distracted by . . . something. (It's always something) saying, "I'll finish and post this later."  Now here it is later, the computer timed out and all I wrote was lost. :(

NOW where do I start?  What to write in a blog on coaching, a subject that has numerous blogs on the Internet.  I ask myself, "What then makes this blog unique?"

Good question.

It begs another question.  "What makes The Coaching Circle unique?  Why would you want to read this particular blog on coaching?  Oops, that is a stacking question.

I guess the place to start is with what brought about the formation of The Coaching Circle.  A desire.  A desire of three individuals, who had just completed coach training with iPEC wanting to gain more proficiency in their coaching to feel confident to coach.

After training it was said, "'Jump into the waters' of coaching, seek out clients and learn through doing."  The three of us felt it important to be in a place we felt confident enough in our new skills to “jump into the water.”  Also, we wanted to continue to be coached, to continue the inner work to our authentic Self.

“Why not coach each other?” and Voila! we did, coach with each other.  That was the beginning of The Coaching Circle.

The Coaching Circle’s first uniqueness is that it began organically.  The Coaching Circle is the creation of three coaches with the desire to be authentic. 

As to what makes this blog unique and have you reading it?  Check back.

]]><![CDATA[This is a test?!?!]]>Sat, 12 Nov 2011 09:42:35 -0500http://maggiefrenchcpc.com/5/post/2011/11/first-post.htmlOkay I am new at this blog stuff.  I must tell you all that I am not certain how this works and what one is "supposed to do" to maintain a blog.  Here I go anyway.  I'll end here because "This is a test."
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